I’ve been a luxury wedding photographer for a decade. I learned 2 big lessons about timing from my own wedding.

Photographer Lydia Koh said a timekeeper could have helped her avoid issues at her own wedding.

Lydia Koh

Lydia Koh is a fine art wedding photographer and founder of a Singapore-based photography company.Koh said a timekeeper can help couples with a less stressful experience — a lesson from her own wedding.She also said couples often stress over preparations and overlook quality time with their guests.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Lydia Koh, a wedding photographer. It has been edited for length and clarity.

I started wedding photography in 2013 when I attended a gorgeous wedding on a ranch in Southern California with a sunset reception. It was very different from the standard Chinese weddings I was used to in Singapore.

That inspired me to photograph more nontraditional outdoor weddings.

In 2021, I started my own photography business, managing everything from shooting and editing to marketing and occasional help from a colleague or my husband.

As much as I’ve learned from photographing weddings over the past decade, the biggest lesson came from my wedding.

Call a friend to keep the time

One of the biggest pieces of advice I give my clients is to ensure they build in plenty of buffer time for their wedding shoot.

It’s important not to cram too much into the timeline because things often go wrong, and one delay can easily affect the rest of the day. Having that buffer is essential to prevent everything from running late.

A cost-effective way to manage this is by appointing a timekeeper. Having someone responsible for keeping track of time helps ensure things stay on schedule without anyone getting flustered.

Everyone will want photos with the couple on the wedding day, and it can be overwhelming to manage everything alone.

When guests ask for photos or try to pull the couple away, it’s difficult for them to say, “I need to go.” The timekeeper can step in and politely keep things on track to help the couple focus on enjoying their special day.

I learned this lesson the hard way at my own wedding.

I didn’t think we’d need a timekeeper, and because of that, my husband shouldered all the stress when things didn’t go as planned. Miscommunication and poor time management left him stressed and flustered, unable to enjoy the day as he was constantly putting out fires.

We eventually fell behind schedule because guests continually came up to take photos with us. Not wanting to turn anyone down, we ended up running late.

We lost track of time and missed key moments without a timekeeper to manage the schedule.

Having someone to keep track of our time and manage guests’ expectations is a good way for couples to be present and enjoy their wedding without worrying about logistics. After all, a wedding is about making memories, not managing schedules.

Have enough time — but not too much

It is also important to schedule enough time to mingle with family and friends, as it is one of the most meaningful parts of the day.

The most genuine moments happen when couples are relaxed, happy, and chatting with their guests. I always remind couples not to treat their wedding like a performance.

Often, they schedule too much time for multiple gown changes, missing out on spending time with their guests. They’re stuck in the hotel room or changing area and don’t experience the day fully.

It’s crucial to remember that the wedding is about more than just looking good — it’s about being present with the people you love.

It is also important not to have a tight schedule and to leave buffer time for unexpected events.

At my wedding, technical issues caused our live musicians to start late, pushing back the entire ceremony.

Since our venue had two floors, my husband constantly ran up and down stairs trying to fix things. The whole situation was overwhelming, and it kept him from fully enjoying the day.

That’s why I always stress the importance of building enough buffer time into the schedule — it gives you room to handle unexpected delays without throwing off the entire event.

Another thing I always tell my clients is not to start the day too early. There is a sweet spot between insufficient buffer time and too much of it. Couples that plan the day too early can quickly experience exhaustion by the time the reception arrives.

Running on adrenaline only lasts so long, and tiredness can impact how much they enjoy the celebration. It’s better to pace things and allow time to relax.